November 19th, 2003.

Tonight we played the Java Lounge, and I’ve got conflicting emotions upon our return. On the one hand, we saw… well, I think she’s the most spectacular singer/songwriter I’ve ever seen. There were no unneccessary words, nothing missing from the chords. Incredible guitar playing, and a beautiful sounding guitar. Her voice was exquisite, and she was visually stunning.

I just sat in awe of Danya River.

I’m at a loss of words. Exquisite… fascinating… beautiful – one of those people you want to compliment, but you know you can’t, because you know she must’ve heard everything you’d like to say before.

Sleepy puppies.
Sleepy puppies.

I sat entranced – transfixed. A creature that kept me wishing for eye contact. She played like a goddess, and no goddess is straight. What else is there to say? We got her CD, and I’m afraid to listen to it lest it lets me down… Heather went straight to her guitar once we got home, and I went straight to the Journal.


Photo By Charles Steinberg From Danyariver.Com

Sigh. She was like Jennie’s creme brouille… too sweet to consume en masse – and yet, you never wanted it to end. There’s very little that I’m willing to ration, but Danya… and the creme brouille, were just like that. I wanted to savour every moment. I wanted her to play slower so I could integrate every note into my body. Hwah.

I’m probably going to be in trouble with Heather for ranting like this, actually, so I’d best quit writing about her.

Go check her out. There are a couple of East Coast dates on her calendar, and she’d be worth the road trip. I swear, no disappointment. Not there, anyhow.

However, with us…

And CRAZY tall, too!
And CRAZY tall, too!

With us, it’s a different story. I’m beginning to have my first doubts about surviving like this. I always make it sound easy, and I always felt good, because there are a bunch of people who swell my head into believing that because it’s me, it can’t fail.

I’m beginning to worry about messing it all up. We tried doing the portraits for the first time today, and there wasn’t even anyone who came over to take a peek. We DID sell CDs – and we can blame it all on the incredibly sparse crowd… but it was very discouraging. I say it out loud sometimes – making connexions with people… portraits… taking pictures and sharing email addresses – and I feel stupid. There’s a whole lot of contact in the world already. My water drip isn’t going to see much change, is it…

Jennie's creme brouille. God knows if I'm spelling that right... it's ... er... go back and see all the Danya adjectives. It's like that.
Jennie’s creme brouille. God knows if I’m spelling that right… it’s … er… go back and see all the Danya adjectives. It’s like that.

And I watch people like Danya – and realize that our song-smithing has SOO far to go… our vocals, even guitar work… SOOO far to go.

Well, at least my ego’s getting trimmed. Heather’s practicing scales right now… I should be doing the same… instead, I’m becoming a spectacular typist.

Hee... creme brouille with my new knife that I bought from a mountain man! It's like a straight razor, just in case I get TOO frustrated with Life on the road.
Hee… creme brouille with my new knife that I bought from a mountain man! It’s like a straight razor, just in case I get TOO frustrated with Life on the road.

Erf – such a weird mixed night. The beautiful echoes in my head, and it’s wonderful to hang around with Jennie again… and the mountains on the horizon, and the smell of woodsmoke in the air… and the fear of failure nipping at my heals.

Yeah, I should go practice scales too… in the meantime, celebrate page 100 with me…

Helenbeth gets half of page 100 cause she and Nick are awesome.
Helenbeth gets half of page 100 cause she and Nick are awesome.

And Amy gets the other half, cause she’s keeping me alive right now.

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